Tuesday, December 28, 2004


Today's mood :>
another new nick for my msn...


The fire of love still burning up my heart,
makes me hot until non-stop mumbling my love for him

this nick i compose for him..dunno he can c o not..wish he can understand why am i doing this..i wish there's an end for the problem between us..can he listen to the mumblings?

Love Problem

Today's mood :>
im really in damn serious prob in love...i dunno what happen to us..we used to be happy talking to each other..we used to have the same thought...y suddenly things changed in such a short time? y our faith lost in such a fast speed like a lighting..?

i didnt lie..i really didnt lie to him.. y he doesnt believe me anymore.. i admit i did make a small lie last time..but i dunwan n dun wish he angry at me..i nvr wish for his angryness.. everything i did is juz want his attention..to make me feel more secure n loved..i wonder who can measure my love to him..y does distance take away his love? im wrong? i wish i get the wrong thing too..

i really miss those days being with him..we sat outside on the see-saw to watch stars and the big bright moon..i still remember he told me what's HACKS..the sweet..he passed me the paper n told me HACKS stand for Hanya Aku Cinta Kau Sahaja (I Love U only)..and also Hanya Awak Cinta Ku Sahaja (U Love Me only) that's so sweet rite? he nvr talked to me like this now...althou im not wishing him to talk to me in the way that is only sweet words..i juz wan to feel that im loved..by him...y is he treating me so cold now?

ppl outside our world always say that im a play'girl'..said that i nvr serious in love.. i wanted to explain that not i dunwan to serious..im sked to be hurt..but i nvr sked to give out my love..when im serious in love i'll always cry..i dont want to c myself crying for love..especially for somebody that doesnt love me..but i always can't stop crying..becuz im really really deep in love with him...

there's someone said..if u really love somebody..u juz wan him to be happy then u'll be happy too...i agree..but the thing is ..i didnt see him happy when being with me..that's really make me sad..i felt so useless..so helpless..so guilty..that im not being a good gf..didnt make my bf to be happy..

i really want him back to my side...i wan to stay beside him...who can help me...even god wants to tear us apart...or he's the one who dunwan to be with a person that doesnt make him happy?i dun wish to think so much..but i dunwan to escape from this problem..last time if i stand in the same situation, i'll go n sleep n dunwan to think bout this again..but now i wish this problem can be solved n we return to the old days when we're happy to c each other...but y is he escaping? i dun understand.....

Sunday, December 26, 2004


Today's mood :>
anybody know what's the meaning? i translate lah

rainbow at the night, snow at the tropics;
我们都一起欣赏过的奇景,the wonderful view we watched together,
can they prove that we really have fate?

i put this chinese phrase on my msn nick...actually how many of u believe that there's a rainbow at nite and malaysia dropping snow...haha..abit wrong channel rite..? i believe that if u pass these with a person..for sure u have fate with this person..n this person with me is Him..maybe i juz wan to comfort myself..tell myself that we have fate..LoLx..but it's really rare to see those view lah...hehehe...maybe i wont forget Him...maybe there's an end for our fate...so many maybe..what can i think of ler? better dun think of them..juz let it be..rite?

Friday, December 24, 2004

Merry Xmas!

Today's mood :>
ooo..so fast 1 yr passed...haihz..getting older jor..fat jor..more problems jor..more pimples jor..LoLx..today is xmas eve oh...got any plan? erm..i still havent decide what to do tonite..heehee..oh yea..i got my line back ediz..now i can online at home loo~~ hohoh...even i can online at home doesnt mean i'll lose anything ga..i'll GAIN something..not losing..nyekzz...ermm...going to update this bloggie lah..if got time (if i can put away maple story...) LoLx...alrite..come often..i'll update very often de...ok! :P

Wednesday, December 08, 2004


Today's mood :>
I've lost everything for u..my time, my feeling, my emotions, my thinking, my family, my money, my friends, my phone, real everything..did u take it for granted? Did u give me ur world too? comparing doesn't exist in love..so i don't care.. but is it love is only juz giving out? it's 2 parties depending each other..i admit im not as good as others, im not as pretty as others, im nothing better than others..or i lost my confidence to u too? Am I the loser? Did I lose something? Is there a place in ur heart for me to stand still? I lose..and I lost..Do u have something to say? yea..i've got it right..u hide something from me..If i didnt ask u that, what will u say to bluff me? i hate myself on being "too clever" to see through u..can i juz turn my head n run away.. i'm afraid i can't face this.. I'm the real loser...

Thursday, December 02, 2004


Today's mood :>
urgh..although i didnt sleep whole night to complete my assignment..but i still very STRENGTHFUL and ENERGETIC loo..haha..cuz holidayzzz loo! although i still havent finish my photography portfolio.. :( in this holiday i wanna do something for myself..sharpen dreamweaver skills and flash too..going to redesign a brand new layout for this boring bloggie..good luck to me lah! must plant self motivation in me..!! leave me a comment to wish me good luck ;D

Wednesday, December 01, 2004


Today's mood :>
erm..i stopped so many days didn't post liao..something i wan to share..today actually im supposed to rush a project but i still at outside..surprisingly..i tot i will be crying..but i didn't..i guess i handle that quite well but too bad i hurt another person..the one who always stand beside me..i felt so guilty..if i can choose i really dont wanna hurt anybody..in the other hand, i sked i'll be hurt too..im so confusing..saying sorry is the only thing i can do..i tried to cheer up that person..but that person still feels angry..i understand..things that already past..it's past..we don't need to look back..but remember the good lessons..look forward, dude!
Today's mood :>

aiyaa..im acolyte? i thought archer..hehe..nvm..I'M KIND!

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

3rd Chance from God

Today's mood :>
u might find that u'r lucky to have 2nd chance..today used to be feng's group presentation..but becuz of lacking of time..they're allowed to present next week..i know it's a happy news..it aint bad but when they say they might have the 3rd chance from Him..im very unhappy but not angry or mad at them like one in my class..hehe..i said "Go to hell!" when they said that..bcuz if u think that He will give u the 2nd chance..go n try to kill urself c whether He'll save ur life..then u'll know whether He loves u..or not?i know this will make somebody hurt..im sorry for that la..pls look around whether there's a chance for u to do something useful..dun waste any chance but anyway im wasting time in here oso..hahaha..im not a good example too :( anyway, u r welcome to gimme some comment on this title lo.. :)

To Be Continued...

Today's mood :>
aww man..i juz got news from Fish..she said chee fong, my OLM lecturer going to resign..i tot he was kidding me..anyway he's really a good lecturer..everything is nice on him..anyway..he's sagis too..maybe u'll say "aww...sagis again a.."haha..im sorry bout that..but sagistarians r always nice n kind guy to me..o.O wonder y...back to the resign thingy..he's playful in class..but i guess most of my classmates like him..he gave me a bday present..talked to me when im upset..solving our programming problems..sad to hear that lah..but i wish this is not what he wish to do..i'll tell myself he's forced to resign..anyway he's still a good fren of mine :) everybody cross ur fingers n pray for him ba..if u hope that he'll leave the one, pls at least wish him get a better job..hehe..


Today's mood :>
faith is a nickname of a fren of mine..he's a nice guy bcuz he's sagis..haha..he's quite leng chai 1 er..n still available leh! okok..go to the main point, tmr 25 Nov is his 21st bday..if im not mistaken..today went to eat KFC with bunch of classmates..including "soulforger" my OLM lecturer, chee fong..i felt happy to eat with lotsa frens lo..although nobody belanja me..haha..my home pc still can't online bcuz of the f*cking modem..i've paid "stimyx" for almost half a yr without using it..arggh...crap crap crap..today should be abit tired but luckily i rest whole nite long last nite..i should be rushing marker visual..but too tired to continue awake to the 37th hour..so went to sleep..i know it's not good to rush last minute work but things doesnt go so smooth..that week b4 this i was badly sleepy n tiring..althou im still feeling that way now but i tried not to touch my bed becuz i'll definitely asleep..i think that's the way to continue my work..dun waste the 1/3 life time on sleeping..to continue work..eugene had come back from aussie..im really happy with it at 1st but then..i..im not too sure about him..i know he has to spend time with his family..im not mad on him that he didnt find me at the 1st place..i didnt even crazy bout him now..time has washed away my feeling..?nah..nothing can wash away it but he himself..im not asking anything from him now but i wish that he's fine, i wish that he's blessed by the one above us..maybe the one i love is not him but "he" that always stay in my heart.."he" is perfect n unchangable..an illusion in my heart of a perfect man that having his face..so it's not him...argh..i wish u can understand what i mean..this post is too long liao la..i continue in next post..haha..

Thursday, November 18, 2004

smile to the world

Today's mood :>
yea..y am i using 'smilega1' (smile girl) as my email...usernames and etc...becuz i think smiling is a good attitude (that's for sure la) and will make the day becomes prettier and smoother..ah....crapz...posting this piece of bloggie is becuz of the fella beside me, Fish...she forced me to type..>< haha...c..she's laughing already..hrmph!~ but many ppl oso say that im lazy to write bloggie la..hrmph..so...juz update for my fans' convinience...=.=" okay la...update when im free again.....*yawnz* oh yea...found a nice percussion webbie..STOMP... have a look on their performances ^_^

Tuesday, November 09, 2004


Today's mood :>
alrite alrite..somebody is complaining that im pressuring them on my bday..hahah...im really happy and appreciate those comments u guyz gave me..especially my lovely kor kor , eugene that had left malaysia (and me..T_T) for his further studies in Australia..kor, thx for ur msg..nvm la..u already forgot my bday for 3 yrs edi..dont really mind that liao..and it's better this yr that at least u visit my bloggie..it's really the 1st time u visit here rite? in other hand, im not so happy that i had made somebody misunderstood by my sms after my bday..i didnt mean to hurt him but i have to learn to say "NO" from now on..kor, i got abit heartache when u said u'r happy that i found my true loved 1..i tot that i can't forget u and everything that happened between u and me..those lovely n sweety memories..finally i found out that..if 1 day..i suddenly think of u, means that i already forget u..to help me look forward..but of cuz, i'll nvr forget those days we had together..i wanna thank u for giving me those memories, advises, kisses and huggiez..thank for bluffing me so that i feel happy behind the beautiful lies...i wish u'r blessed over there and having happy times like me :) i really hope that u can come back malaysia safely..god bless u...(im not a christian ya..)hehe...

Friday, October 22, 2004

4 a.m

Today's mood :>
today is my birthday..yea..22 Oct..last nite i had the most memorable birthday celebration with my lovely sweety bf >///< he brought me to a restaurant called "tian mi mi" <--in chinese, meaning sweety..hoho..after that he bought me a chocolate cake roll and white candles..LoLx..u know those for candles used when no electricity? haha..celebrating my last 4 yrs bday n next yrs' bday..after that we had a good sleep until 4am..that was the time my mom called my hp n asked me to go home quickly..yeah im "cinderella" that's the end of my most memorable bday..bcuz since im born..every single bday i've been is always on exam period..last yr i started my college life..but unfortunately..my pet bro's sister passed away so i went to her funeral on my bday..so it's the most most sad bday i've been..now i wanted to change everything..bday should be happy 1..rite? i wish everybody is blessed n have everything smooth in their lives..and thanks for everyone who wish me happy birthday :) i love u guyz ..u guyz roxxx yea...

Monday, September 27, 2004

For Those Who Miss Me Online

Today's mood :>
yeah..I finally broke my own record for not onlining for almost 2 months..heehee..somebody missing me? er..if u'r reading this, i think u started to miss me liao..hohohoh..cuz not many ppl will visit my blog..if they r, they're missing me at the same time ^^ tq for missing me n visiting my bloggie oo..oh yea..my birthday is coming..erm..coming soon less than 1 month..it's on 22 OCT, alrite..remember to gimme bday present :P my phone line is going to fix on the start of october..but it's kinda "no problem" for me to not online liaoz..if u have been not touching the pc for 2 months..u'll know how i feel..haha..rite? im now in PxSilver in sunway..the keyboard is same with my home 1~~~ewww i feel like onlining at home..hahaha..alrite, stop here..good luck to everyone n all the best..may God bless u :)

Friday, June 18, 2004


Today's mood :>
aihhh..it's already 1:50am..but i still havent sleep..havent do assignments..n everything is not done yet..i dun feel like doing..my lazyness is coming bacl..pls help?

Sunday, June 13, 2004

- [e]|vi[e] - in her room ^^

Wednesday, June 09, 2004


Today's mood :>
hey everyone..it's quite sometimes since my last post..it's right at the time for the turning point in my life..i stepped into the multimedia world..everything juz fresh to me..i guess i can handle well but still i can't passup my assignments on time..maybe the ppl all around the world will think that i play too much of games n forget bout my assignments..i can tell u that u'r definitely WRONG! i can surf net, play games n do my assignment at the same time..althou it might take a long time to finish my assignment but i found that i can be more concentrate with my comp ON! plz clean ur mind n accept the brand new me..u'll be surprised..*winkz* good luck everyone

Sunday, April 18, 2004

The Craziest Thing I Ever Seen

Today's mood :>
hrm...so far the craziest thing i ever seen is.......RM2300++ Telephone Bill......OMG!!! it's my last month telephone bill..i really can't imagine it if my father see that..but luckily my family didnt talk bout that..PHEW~~cuz my brother going to pay that..LoLx..for me, i only use my house phone for internet..only rm100+..T.T im so sked if my parents wants to cut the phone line....i'll not be online anymore........wu wu wu wu.......but it's ok now...n my mom is sleeping peacefully *snoring* on my lovely comfortable bed..^^

Tuesday, April 13, 2004

-=[s!LLy s!x]=-

Today's mood :>
erm..silly six is the name of my gang of frens from cd32, TOA. They are cute and funny yet always pass up their works on time! such a good gang of frens or classmates..^^ im happy to know u guyz..(tricia, evonne, jeremy, caryn and ram) although we're going on our own life later on (except for the love life of jeremy n evonne) LoLx..we've had our sweet times n memories even i juz knew u guyz for around 6 months..if can i hope our friendship will go on to forever..but this seems imposibble..tricia's going to get scolarship n leave TOA..ram n i r going to take multimedia as our major..wish that someday we'll yum cha together..by taking this advantage, i wanna apologize for whatever i did that might hurt u guyz feeling..im so sorry..but i dun think i did..:P hope u guyz can archieve the best in ur studies..good luck to u guyz..cya again~ dun cry baby..i love u guyz

Tuesday, April 06, 2004

RedBox lalalalala~

Today's mood :>
come singgggg along with me..^^im going redbox near pyramid later on..but actually im not good at singing..but im good at shouting all the way..LoLx..somebody can teach me sing pls? Raise up ur hand!

Friday, March 19, 2004


Today's mood :>
feel so bad today..few dayz ago i was planning to make a webpage for my group of friends..i juz plan..i didnt tell them bout that..i juz told 1 of them n talked to him in class...then another girl came n trying to ask what r we talking about..then maybe i act too obvious that i dunwan anybody to know bout my planning so she looked very shocked , worry n oso sad as she said "ic..u got something to tell him but not me..what's the secret that u can tell him but not all of us.."im too afraid to let ppl think that im not trustworthy o i might betray them..i dunwan to tell them bout my planning bcuz im not sure that i can do it well..i dunwan anybody to disappoint and , of course, look down on me..so i talked to the girl n wish that she understands what im thinking n feeling..i guess she'll think bout it when she gets home...hope that this wont break our friendship...peace forever..

Monday, March 15, 2004


Today's mood :>
lolx...yeahhh got new pc liao...hrm..now can blog liao lohhh....alrite..but always got error -.- maybe cuz of me lar...(must be me loh) haihzz...simply dl or install thingy...blehz..later got class...haihzz...assignment still havent finish..chamz ler...how u guyz lar? like disappeared edi...hrm...i miss u guyz...leave me msg lahh...bored.....>.<

Thursday, March 11, 2004

College Life

Today's mood :>
haihz...im in lab now..lecture's not teaching now of cuz..lolx..erm..hope u guyz happy with ya college life oso..enjoy & relax lah~ erm..im gonna have a term break 1 month later..it's around end of march or starting of april..if got any plan or trip remember call me wor..call me at 016-6906730..i will have new pc on friday..sooooooooo HAPPY!! erm..i've been so long nvr blog..everything is so messy in my life..but now is getting better..hope u guyz happy n good luck always~ ciaoz!! ^^V

Saturday, January 17, 2004

Happy CNY!!

Today's mood :>
yoohoooooo!!!! CNY coming..got angpaoooozzzzzz /gg ^^ but too bad..i gotta stay at home n do assignments.. anybody feel sad for me? heheh...nvm looo if u dun feel sad for me...(i'll curse u until u feel sad for me.../gg) i go class loh...bubbai~